Sometimes, we find ourselves in difficult situations or communicating with difficult people who just “don’t get it”.
Assertiveness means protecting our rights without violating the rights of another person. This includes:
- Saying “No”
- Expressing how you feel, what you think, what you want and what you need
- Being treated with respect
- Making decisions about our own lives
- Having the freedom to make mistakes and taking responsible for them
- Changing some situations
- Being able to communicate “I don’t know”, “Maybe” and “I don’t understand”
- Having the right to privacy
- Being able to ask for help
- Being able to grow, learn and change
Useful phrases
People who use AAC may need vocabulary to be assertive. Vocabulary can be represented in pictures, text and spelling. It is suggested that vocabulary be introduced within a learning context where people can learn how and when to use it.
| Items | Sample vocabulary |
| Opinions | Yes and No Maybe I don’t know I don’t care Sometimes I need to think about it I agree I don’t agree |
| Preferences | I’d prefer I like it when… I don’t like it when… |
| There’s a problem | I have a problem with that I have an issue I want to talk to you about something Something is bothering me |
| Feelings | I feel… I don’t feel… When you do that I feel… |
| Urgency | This is important It’s not important |
| Feedback | That’s great! Good! Perfect! That’s not what I want This is unacceptable |
| Softeners AAC devices can sound harsh. Some participants recommend using phrases to make their messages sound more polite. |
I’m sure you don’t mean it, but… Don’t take this the wrong way, but… It might help if you… I’d prefer if you… |
| Take action | I need you to… I want … Could you… Otherwise I will have to… |
| Negotiating | What do you suggest? What do you need to happen? I need this to happen… |
| Monitoring | Let’s try it for a while Let’s see how it goes Let’s meet again … Let’s keep a record |